Mungo McCrackas has been in some scrapes before but now he’s wanted by the US government for accidentally assailing the Commander-in-Chief’s pods. It’s only a matter of time before they bring their huge resources and intelligence to bear and flush him out into the open. However, as we all know, football is more important than life itself and the FA are trying to get to him first. One way or the other he’s going to end up selling something to somebody and that can only be good news for the economy. I’m backing Britain.

Mungo is by David Squires.

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