Author: Ted

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Mungo S03E13

Football this week has been brought to you by the number 10, the letter C and the word brinkmanship, and it’s no different at Heart of Clachmaninshire. The fallout from Mungo McCrackas’ transfer request...

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Mungo S03E12

It’s late October, which means the first frosts are on the ground, the nights are drawing in and Heart of Clachmaninshire FC are in crisis. But this year, they’ve done it in some style....

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Mungo S03E11

With the Egggate saga still rumbling on, Heart of Clachmaninshire find themselves desperately short-staffed for a cup tie this week.  Luckily for the ramshackle selection of trainees and passers-by, our hero Mungo McCrackas was...

The Premier League First Eleven 14

The Premier League First Eleven

On Monday, Ian King wrote on this very site that Liverpool’s current problems had “gone far enough to stop even being amusing to the neutral”.  Whilst there are aspects of that which, as a...

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Mungo S03E10

The Egggate scandal has completely consumed Scottish football this week, as a high-profile court case seeks to clarify whether or not Heart of Clachmaninshire’s sensational new star Eggo McCrackas really could have been born...

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Mungo S03E09

After last week’s startling egg-based development, one might have expected our heroes from Heart of Clachmaninshire FC to take a bit of a breather and settle down.  However, they are doing no such thing,...

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Mungo S03E07

Time for our weekly visit to Heart of Clachmaninshire FC, wherever the hell that is.  And it is pleasing to note that, visits of the Pontiff and unexpected displays of match-winning form from previously...

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Mungo S03E06

Club versus player loyalties will be tested this week, as all the many fans of Heart of Clachmaninshire amongst you witness Mungo McCrackas’ debut for another club.  But how will the Highland League find...

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Mungo S03E05

This week’s Mungo sees Heart of Clachmaninshire’s squad, besieged by a heap of steaming beef in last Thursday’s thrilling cliffhanger, find their salvation in a burly deadline day transfer signing.  But what will it...

Wigan Athletic Bingo! 1

Wigan Athletic Bingo!

Since their last clean sheet – a nil-nil home draw with Portsmouth on 14th April this year – Wigan have played 6 Premier League matches, winning one, drawing one and losing four.  In the...

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Mungo S03E04

Mungo time again.  This week, our heroes bounce back from their opening day disappointment with a corporate gig at a dairy farm.  Peril, inevitably, ensues.  Fans of teams who have had a stuttering start...

Joey Barton’s Moustache: A Photo Essay 2

Joey Barton’s Moustache: A Photo Essay

The big news from the Premier League’s opening week has surely been Newcastle’s loveable midfielder Joey Barton’s pledge to not shave off his moustache until his club win their first league match of the...

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Mungo S03E03

It’s Thursday again, which brings with it the crushing inevitability of another edition of Mungo.  It’s accurately named this week, too, as our protagonist single-handedly fails to make an appearance.  This would be an...

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Mungo S03E02

Thursday means it’s time for more from Heart of Clachmaninshire.  Last week they were warned by their ‘eccentric’ chairman Sir Roddy Bulbs that another last-gasp 11th place finish this season wouldn’t save the club...