The Street Pharmacists Guide To Football: The Premier League Screws You Up

Ahead of the new series of Cafe Calcio, which begins on the thirteenth of September on Resonance FM, co-host Chris Roberts is back to with a look at the links between football and… heroin. Like any other drug football is exciting and takes one somewhere else. Everyone is doing it. It brings tremendous joy. It brings people together. Makes you connect with others in a dizzying journey. All excited for the new season? Ready for the roller coaster ride of joy and harmless pleasure that is watching soccerball? In might be as well to consider some of the possible downsides. Diet – Bad meat, fizzy drinks, and confectionary consumed at odd times and in strange combinations, often with too much alcohol, can result in constipation, stomach ulcers as well as reduction of vitamin intake. Heart – Inappropriate sudden movements, extreme emotional highs and lows combined with poor diet and lack of exercise may result in heart failure. Finance – Costly trips to ground alongside travel, souvenirs, TV packages and lost work opportunities can result in poverty and unemployment. Libido – Whilst victory may increase potency, the other factors taken in combination can reduce it. Also the opportunities for romance are reduced by attendance at games. Eyesight – Ability to see things that aren’t there whilst also failing to spot glaringly obvious incidents. Skin – Spending time in the pub, at...

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