Day: May 14, 2009

Shit Shot Mungo: Episode 15

It’s the end of the Scottish League season, and Heart of Clackmannannshire are stranded near the bottom of the table. Controversial player-manager Mungo McCrackas has some “innovative” ideas ahead of their next match, though it seems that the answer to their problems might be more obvious than anyone realises. Can they finally win another league match and find a way of somehow avoiding the drop? Scribbled in crayon, as ever, by the huggly-wuggly Ted “The Neck” Carter – a larger version is, of course, available...

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Carlos Tevez – Football’s Tug Of Love Child

Manchester United moved to within one point of their second successive Premier League championship with a 2-1 win at Wigan Athletic last night, and Carlos Tevez’s sublime backheel to bring them level provided further evidence, as if it was needed, of Tevez’s value to Alex Ferguson’s team. One suspects, however, that the Argentinian striker’s lasting legacy to football will end up being the constant of tug of wars over his registration as a player. Nothing in the career of Carlos Tevez, from his multi-million pound transfer to Corinthians at the age of twenty to his current contractual negotiations, has ever been straightforward. His agent, Kia Joorabchian still retains ownership of the player’s registration and, as befits such a bizarre contractual relationship, Tevez’s career has taken a few unexpected steps. His transfer from Boca Juniors to Corinthians was brokered through Joorabchian, who has given every impression of completely controlling all of his player’s movements since then. When Tevez signed on loan for West Ham United with Javier Mascherano in the summer of 2006, it came amid reports in the British press that other clubs had turned down the offers made because of the onerous terms that Joorabchian insisted upon and, although Tevez’s performances during the closing stages of that season helped an otherwise moribund West Ham team to stay up, West Ham have come to repent at leisure over their...

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Fisher Athletic – An Obituary

This morning, non-league football’s least surprising bankruptcy was confirmed at the High Court in London, as former Blue Square South side Fisher Athletic were finally put out of their misery out wound up. For many, Fisher had been little more than a shell of a club since they left their Surrey Docks stadium in 2004 to ground-share at Dulwich Hamlet’s Champion Hill, five miles away from their traditional Rotherhithe base. Crowds had fallen to barely 100 people since their move away from Surrey Docks and, ultimately, the question of what the point of Fisher Athletic was became a more and more pertintent one as their support dissolved away and a move back to the Docklands area of London became less and less likely. Certainly Her Majesty’s Revenues and Customs, who eventually forced through the winding up order over an unpaid £250,000 tax bill, had their patience tested to breaking point. Fisher Athletic were founded in 1908 to provide sporting opportunities for underprivileged children living in the Docklands area of East London and were named for St John Fisher, a Catholic martyr executed by Henry VIII for refusing to accept the King as the head of the church of England. They remained an amateur club until the early 1980s, playing in the Parthenon League, the Kent Amateur League and the Spartan League before joining the Southern League as they moved...

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